Us At First Read online

  My birthday is tomorrow, so I’m assuming that’s why he’s sending me another package. I’m excited to see if he’s sticking to jewelry or if he’ll branch out into something else.

  “Another package from Ian?” Logan asks as he comes into my room, plopping onto my bed to lie on his back.

  “Yep. Where’s your pocket knife? I forgot to grab the scissors.” Ian tapes up the packages so that you can’t easily open them. It’s annoying as hell. I’ve told him to stop, but he won’t. Logan pulls his pocket knife from his pocket, but since he doesn’t let anyone else use it, he takes my package and opens it up for me. I grab the box and pull out another box. The presents are always wrapped inside. It looks to be too big for jewelry.

  I unwrap it to find what you’d normally put clothes in when wrapping presents, but when I open that, I find a book. It’s a recent release I’ve been wanting by one of my favorite authors, but haven’t gotten around to buying yet. My fingers gingerly run over the front cover and peel off the sticky note that says, “Open me.”

  A scream erupts when I see that it’s signed. Oh my god!

  “Look!” I turn it around to shove it at Logan’s face. “It’s signed! Oh my god! I’ve never had a book signed before!” No one will let me borrow the car to go to the signings when they are sort of close by. I grab my phone and call Ian.

  “Like it?” he answers.

  “If you were here, I’d kiss you. Thank you so much.”

  “Really?” He audibly perks up. “I thought it would be a good present, but I didn’t think it would be that good. I had to wait in line for four hours for that, gorgeous. Four hours.”

  “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for doing that for me.”

  “Of course,” he replies quietly as if he’d do anything for me.

  “This is my first signed book.” Logan waves from his spot on the bed, so I add, “Logan says hey.”

  “Hey to him, and that’s cool. Want to know something else?”

  “What?”

  “I read it.”

  I gasp. “You read this book? The one that’s been signed?”

  “I was in line for four hours, Sydney. I needed to do something and you like this dude, who seems a bit like a weirdo in person, just so you know, so I figured I’d give it a shot. It’s a pretty good book.”

  I lie down next to Logan. “I don’t know if I can handle this. First, the book is signed, and now, you’re telling me that you read and liked a book.”

  Ian laughs, and goodness, I’ve missed that. We haven’t talked on the phone in about a month or so. “Sounds like I made your birthday.”

  “You have.”

  “Good.” He’s quiet for a moment. “I’ve missed talking to you.”

  Logan snorts and I point for him to leave since he can obviously hear our conversation. “You talk to her every day!” he says loud enough for Ian to hear him before I turn and push him with my feet off the bed. He glares at me as he leaves, making a show of rubbing his side.

  “You know what I mean,” Ian says.

  “Yeah, I do. If you’ve missed me, why haven’t you called?”

  “Just been busy.”

  That’s such a bullshit answer. How can someone have time to text with little to no delay between responses, but doesn’t have time to actually talk on the phone? I don’t say that, though. He probably has a new girlfriend if he isn’t calling. Or maybe he’s busy with hockey or something. “Well, thanks again for my present.”

  “You’re welcome. Happy birthday, too. Go read your new book and text me later.”

  “Oh, I will.”

  “And tell that guy you’ll go on a date with him.”

  “I’ll think about it.” There’s a lull and I wait for him to make the move to end the call as usual.

  “Hey, gorgeous.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Do you think...” His voice trails off. I sit up on my bed, feeling nervous as I realize that he sounds nervous. “Do you think you’d be able to come up for Christmas? I’d love to see you.”

  See? How can he tell me to go on a date with a guy and then ask if I can come see him this year for Christmas?

  “Maybe. I’ll probably have to convince Mom that I want to be there, but I can try. You won’t be busy?”

  “Not for an entire week. You can come, stay at your dad’s, but spend all your time with me.”

  “What does your dad say?”

  Ian is quiet for a moment. “Well, when I mentioned it, I made it sound like you might be coming up to see your dad, not me, though I don’t think he believes me. But you still don’t really get along with your dad, so he can fuck up like he usually does and that’s the perfect reason for you to be with me the whole time.”

  Yeah. I turn seventeen tomorrow. It’s not like my mom will let me go halfway across the country to see an eighteen-year-old who will graduate high school this year. Let’s not even talk about how I’m already nervous about him going away to college and meeting college girls. It’s irrational in many ways, but I can’t help it.

  “Will you try? Try until she says yes?”

  How do I say no to him?

  Over the next two months, Ian calls me a few times a week, and I answer, pretending it’s my dad. There’s no way my mom will let me go if she thinks things are still strained between my father and me. When my dad does actually call me, I make sure to be as nice as possible to him. Things aren’t always bad between us, and I’m working hard to keep things good.

  Thanksgiving comes and dinner has died down. I keep waiting for Logan to leave the table, but he doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. I didn’t really want him here because he’s going to give me knowing looks.

  “So, Mom,” I start, needing to get it over with. “Can I spend a week with Dad for Christmas?”

  She immediately glances at my stepdad, Chris, with surprise.

  “I haven’t seen him in over a year—since Grandma’s funeral,” I add.

  “He asked you to come?”

  I nod. Every year, Dad asks me to come, but I usually turn him down without ever mentioning it to Mom. This year, I told him I would ask. I can still hear his surprise ringing in my ears. Logan is staring at me and he reaches under the table to grab my knee. I shove it off of me. The last thing I need is for my plan to be foiled now.

  “You want to spend an entire week with him?”

  “He’s my dad and I haven’t seen him in forever. He wants to spend Christmas with me, so yes.”

  “Okay. If he pays for the plane ticket, then you can go.”

  “Thanks!” It takes everything I have not to squeal with excitement. I pull out my phone and text Ian first and then Dad.

  “Let’s clean up,” Logan says, standing. He picks up his plate and raises an eyebrow at me. I grab my plate and follow him into the kitchen. “You’re going to see him, aren’t you?”

  “Yes,” I answer simply.

  “Do you even plan to spend time with your dad?”

  “Some of it, yeah.”

  “This is crazy!”

  Frowning, I ask, “Why? It’s not like we haven’t met before.”

  “You’ve met once!”

  “And we’ve been talking ever since. Shut up about it, Logan. I’m going.”

  “Fine. Who asked who?”

  “He asked me to come.”

  Logan grumbles under his breath, and I leave to continue clearing off the table since he volunteered us for the job. My phone vibrates with a text.

  Ian: Can’t fucking wait, gorgeous!

  “Stop texting and help me, Syd.”

  I put my phone away for now and help him. Soon, I’ll see Ian again. Can’t fucking wait is the biggest understatement ever.

  Ian: Think of our kiss.

  That’s the text Ian sends me when the time has finally come and I tell him I’m boarding the plane. It’s been so long that I’m sure the details aren’t as good as the real thing. Instead of imagining the kiss we had, I imagine the kiss I’ll get. Dad
is supposed to pick me up, but I’m hoping to have dinner with Ian tonight.

  I’m so nervous about seeing him. I’ve gotten used to the texts and the occasional phone calls. Between that and it being so long since we last saw one another, what if it’s different between us when we’re together in person again? What is it going to be like between us now? I end up worrying about that so much that I almost miss the takeoff. Almost.

  The flight seems to take forever. At least this time, I’m certain Dad will be there waiting for me. He’s been in contact with me all day. My legs bounce for the length of the flight and finally, we’re landing. I only have my carry-on because I can pack like a pro, but I head to the baggage claim anyway since that’s where Dad said he’d meet me.

  Worry starts to creep in when I don’t see him.

  “Hey, gorgeous. You should be looking for me.”

  I whirl around to see Ian. My eyes widen as I take him in. Wow. He doesn’t even look the same. “What happened to you?” I blurt out before I can stop myself.

  He grins. “Growth spurt and I grew a beard,” he answers with a shrug. He isn’t kidding about the growth spurt either. He’s towering over me now. His beard is a little thick. It’s hot and my first thought is that I wonder what it’ll be like to kiss him now. “Looks like you did some growing, too.” His eyes roam over my body in appreciation.

  “Where’s my dad?” I ask before my cheeks can go from a small burn to a full blaze.

  “I convinced him to let me pick you up. Wasn’t easy. Are you going to hug me or just stare at me?” I must hesitate too long because he steps forward and pulls me against him. “So good to see you,” he says, squeezing me tightly.

  “You too. You have more muscles.” I can feel them and they feel good! He’s more solid and wider and wow, he doesn’t even feel the same!

  Ian laughs. “A lot can change in a little over a year, huh?” He lets me go, takes my carry-on bag, and grabs my hand. “Let’s go.”

  I follow him out of the airport and to his car.

  “How was your flight?”

  “It was fine. How did you convince my dad?”

  “Well, first, I had to remind him that we knew each other. Then, I told him that we talked sometimes and I wanted to surprise you and hang out with you for a little bit. He did not want to let me, but once I told him I knew the details of your flight, he was convinced that I was telling the truth and that I could come pick you up as long as you’re home by eleven.”

  Wow. Dad’s giving me the entire day with Ian. That’s kind of odd.

  “Are you sure you’re not kidnapping me because my dad got caught up in something and couldn’t pick me up?”

  “You finding it hard to believe that he’d let you spend so much time with me willingly?”

  “A little bit,” I confess.

  “Fine. I also pointed out that if he let me pick you up, he wouldn’t have to take time off of work. That seemed to motivate him more than anything.”

  Figures.

  “But you’re with me all day. That’s something to smile about.”

  He’s absolutely right. As we leave the airport, I ask, “Do you have anything planned for us?”

  “Oh, I have a lot planned for us.” His devilish grin both unnerves and excites me.

  How is it possible that she’s more beautiful now than she was before? That’s all I can think about when we stop at my favorite restaurant for lunch. Her hair is longer, she may be an inch or so taller, her tits are bigger, and her smile seems more breathtaking than before. I can’t stop looking at her. There are weird feelings in me to see the necklace I gave her resting on her chest, too. It makes me wonder if she’s wearing the anklet as well.

  She rubs her arms for the billionth time. “Gah, it’s so much colder here than back home. I don’t think I brought clothes warm enough for this.”

  “I can keep you warm.”

  Damn. There it is. That blush I haven’t seen in for-fucking-ever. It almost doesn’t make sense. She wasn’t blushing like this when we would send dirty texts to one another, was she? We started out joking, I think, and if I remember correctly, I started taking an inappropriate comment too far and hinted that we should totally start texting. I’d send a text and then she would send one with whatever would happen next. It was like taking turns writing a dirty scene, but featuring us.

  It took me a little bit to warm her up to it, but I was damn glad I did. For someone who is still a virgin and has only ever kissed me, the girl has a filthy imagination and definitely has a way with words. I’ve gotten off from those texts more times than I can count.

  Which sort of brings me to why I wanted to see her again. I had a girlfriend. Things weren’t serious, but they would get hot and heavy and she was totally ready to have sex. But every time we got close, an image of Sydney would pop into my head and I couldn’t do it. We broke up. Drove me fucking crazy. Sydney and I are just friends. I was hoping that seeing her would confirm that, but all it’s doing is making me realize I want her to be the first person I have sex with.

  That is not why I invited her here, so I need to stop thinking about that right now. I only wanted to know what it would be like to see her again. To see if I had legit reasons to be fucked in the head or not.

  My reasons are totally legit.

  I have it bad for a girl I can’t have because she lives halfway across the country and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. If she and her dad got along, I could maybe convince her to move here, but I doubt that would happen. Besides, after I graduate, I’ll be off to college, so what would be the point?

  “Why are you staring at me?” Sydney asks.

  “Sorry. You’re more gorgeous than the last time I saw you. Can’t help it.”

  She rolls her eyes and another blush lights up her cheeks. “I asked you a question.”

  “What was it?”

  “What’s next?”

  I realize then that she’s finished eating. “Well, if you don’t have the appropriate winter clothes, then we can go to my house to hang out for a bit.” I’ve already given her my coat because she was cold, so now I’m cold. “We can chill today since you’ve been traveling. How does that sound?”

  Sydney nods. “As long as I’m warm, I’m down for anything.”

  That is so not the right thing to say to me. Once I pay the bill, we head to my house. Dad is at work, so it’ll be just the two of us for a little while. Maybe we should hang outside the entire time because this is a dangerous setup. I’ll make sure there’s space between us. I won’t touch her or kiss her and all will be well.

  Sydney fucks up that plan.

  I sit on the couch first, which is mistake number one. She sits down next to me with zero space between us. Then, she says, “I need to ask a weird question.”

  “Go for it.”

  “Can I touch your beard?”

  I laugh. “Yeah.”

  That’s mistake number two. She shifts onto her knees to face me. Both of her hands reach up and move over the hair. I’m super proud of this beard. I’m the only one on the team who has been able to grow one like this. It’s not huge, but it’s longer than anyone else’s. It took forever to grow it, but now, I have to trim it to keep it from getting longer and to keep it decent looking.

  “Wow,” Sydney murmurs. She looks fascinated.

  “What?”

  “It’s rough and soft all at once.” She rubs her hands along my jaw and I swear, a shiver runs along her spine. She avoids looking at me as she blushes, which confirms that she did indeed shiver. Her gaze focuses on my mouth. “Another question.”

  “Yes. The answer is yes.”

  She laughs, lifting her eyes to mine. “You don’t even know what it is.”

  “I don’t care. Yes times a million.”

  “Are you sure? What if I want to punch you? You bruise like a peach, remember?”

  I groan. “You were supposed to have forgotten about that.”

  “Sorry.” There’s st
ill a smile playing on her lips, and I want to kiss her.

  “The answer is yes,” I repeat.

  With no hesitation and no pause, she leans forward and kisses me. For Sydney to make a move like that is the last thing I would’ve ever expected her to do. The kiss itself, however, is more like her. It’s tentative at first and then becomes more demanding. Even the kissing is better! I grab her hips to make her straddle me because I need her closer to me. My arms need to be around her waist before I try to take this further.

  Sydney is content with making out. Her arms wind around my neck. How can her mouth and tongue have so much control? I want to unleash the rising need inside of me, but Sydney seems to be in no hurry to do anything about what has to be building inside of her as well. I know it is. She wiggles her hips, making me groan. She tugs on my beard, which turns me on more than makes sense.

  When she nips my lower lip, it’s my undoing. Without thinking of the consequences, my hands begin to roam over her hips, up her sides, and to her breasts. Sydney squeaks in surprise, but keeps kissing me. I give them a squeeze. Fuck. Am I really doing this? Is she letting me? I want to feel her skin. I slip my hands underneath her shirt. Sydney shivers again and groans when I push my hands underneath her bra.

  Man, I wish she’d let her hands leave my beard and do a little exploring of their own. I certainly wouldn’t mind.

  But then, her phone rings loudly from her purse and she jumps out of my lap, leaving my hands empty, my body cold, and me extremely horny. Sydney takes a few deep breaths before she answers.

  “Hey, Dad. Yeah, I got here fine. Yeah, he picked me up. Thanks. Yeah, I’ll be home by then. Okay. Bye. Love you too.” She hangs up and readjusts her bra while avoiding my gaze completely.

  I get up and pick a movie from the DVD stand. “Let’s watch a movie.” Maybe it will relax her to know that we’re going to do something other than kiss and feel each other up. When I’m done setting it up, she’s relaxed into the couch once more and she gives me a brief smile.